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Living With Non Believing Roommates

Discussions relating to Drug Laws

Living With Non Believing Roommates

Postby Per » Tue Nov 29, 2016 12:33 am

3 1/2 years ago my boyfriend was put in prison due to drug related issues. It was the best thing that could have happened to us as it put a stop to a life that was going nowhere fast. When he went in I got clean and rededicated my life to God and the Lord. Because God chose to reach out and save me from drugs and alcohol and a horrible life and I understood His Grace I felt He laid it on my heart to stand by Charlie while he is in prison. I felt God asked me to extend the same grace and love to Charlie that He had given to me. I can assure you at first I wasn't sure I wanted to do that but God pursued me on it and I made the choice to trust Him and stand by a prisoner through thick and thin. We are both aware of the fact we should be dead and know God saved us for a reason. God has taught me through standing by Charlie how to love, stay committed, forgiveness etc etc and though it has been tough I am certainly not sorry I chose to do what I felt led to do. This brings me to my question. In the course of his prison term I have followed him to two different prisons in order to visit and support him and I know God has provided and been there with me through it all. My concern is the living situations I have been in. I have lived in various places and due to finances they have been in buildings that were less than ideal with tenants who didn't follow the Lord nor pretend to. They were people with drug and alcohol issues. I use to question if I was suppose to be there  or not and kept leaving the environment only to find myself in a similar one. The last 2 places that I have attempted to live in have been with actual roommates. The last one was a drug addicted alcoholic with pretty deep issues and though she was a nice person I thought I had made a mistake due to her life style and mine clashing. Little did I know it could get worse. When Charlie got transfered this 2nd time I was on an extended visit with my sister in North Carolina and wasn't sure if I could move to where he was. Well low and behold one of his brothers lived in the next town over with his wife and they offered to let me stay there so I could be close to Charlie. I had my reservations and knew they weren't Christians but according to what they told me there would be no drugs or alcohol in the apartment among other points they made that I based my decision to come here on. Again looking back I don't know if I really sought Gods thoughts on it or just wanted to be close to Charlie and get back to standing by him. I know I really prayed about it and now I think maybe I was just hoping for the best. I guess I got myself confused because I've had this debate regarding living with non believers for the last 1-2 years and don't have a good solid answer. I get some thoughts from people that I could be the light people needed and could be an example of a Christian for people who didn't know God. I have gotten various answers but nothing that has given me peace on this subject. I can't go back wards and until God opens up a door for me and gives me some direction I don't feel like I can leave. I am asking for future reference as I truly think I made a mistake coming here. These people are extremely racist(I mean straight out of the southern 50's), foul mouthed(When the say Jesus, Christ or God they aren't calling for him- among the other horrible words they use), drug addicted, drug dealers and so on and so on. It's so bad here that this is why I doubt my choice in coming here. I can't believe God would lead me into a living situation like this! I have sought Gods forgiveness and continue to pray for guidance and direction and I know He loves me and will direct me and show me an open door when he is ready. I'm sorry this is so long but I wanted to explain myself. So that is my question- according to the bible should a Christian be living with non believers? I know it is written in various places about being unequally yoked, fleeing from different sins etc so I would like your thoughts on this please! I think I need to base my future living arrangements on being able to live in an environment that honors God but perhaps I am being biased or not being loving or something....what I know is I am miserable in this type of environment and have truly confused myself! Thank you for your time and answer!  
Per
 
Posts: 37
Joined: Sun Apr 06, 2014 10:56 am

Living With Non Believing Roommates

Postby Zachary » Wed Nov 30, 2016 7:08 am

Francie,

Your situation is one that is not dealt with extensively in the Scriptures.  We know that we are to choose partners(whether in marriage, business, or the church) who are godly and seeking to honor Christ.  Living with someone, however, is not exactly in that category, it seems to me.  If you are seeking to honor and serve Christ, I think that the Lord could very powerfully use you to touch people with His grace.  However, it might also be that in seeking to honor Him, you remove yourself from a situation that is too much for you.  Truly, this is not as much a matter of obeying a command of Scripture as it is understanding your maturity in following Christ. If you are strong enough to endure the sinfulness around you and even shine beautifully as a light, then do so with joy and deep love for those people!  Understand that they are acting wickedly because they don't embrace the One who makes us righteous.  We were all wicked until He made us righteous, right?  Seek the Master's compassion and patience towards them.

On the other hand, if you evaluate yourself and you honestly don't think yourself mature and strong enough to do all of that, then it might be best for you to seek(with the Lord's guidance) a place that will actually encourage and strengthen you.

It is hard to answer your question with certainty because it depends very much on you as an individual.  My sense of it is, though, that your doubts are an indication that you should not be there.  If it is as troubling as it seems to be, then you already know the answer to the question.

Whatever you do, please do it out of love - love for God and your neighbor.  The law of God's kingdom is LOVE, so choose based on what is best for others.  The Lord will ensure your best as you do all you can for the best of others!  Amen.

Please feel free to keep the conversation going with any further comments or questions.
Zachary
 
Posts: 35
Joined: Thu Mar 20, 2014 6:16 am

Living With Non Believing Roommates

Postby Berdy » Wed Nov 30, 2016 7:28 am

3 1/2 years ago my boyfriend was put in prison due to drug related issues. It was the best thing that could have happened to us as it put a stop to a life that was going nowhere fast. When he went in I got clean and rededicated my life to God and the Lord. Because God chose to reach out and save me from drugs and alcohol and a horrible life and I understood His Grace I felt He laid it on my heart to stand by Charlie while he is in prison. I felt God asked me to extend the same grace and love to Charlie that He had given to me. I can assure you at first I wasn't sure I wanted to do that but God pursued me on it and I made the choice to trust Him and stand by a prisoner through thick and thin. We are both aware of the fact we should be dead and know God saved us for a reason. God has taught me through standing by Charlie how to love, stay committed, forgiveness etc etc and though it has been tough I am certainly not sorry I chose to do what I felt led to do. This brings me to my question. In the course of his prison term I have followed him to two different prisons in order to visit and support him and I know God has provided and been there with me through it all. My concern is the living situations I have been in. I have lived in various places and due to finances they have been in buildings that were less than ideal with tenants who didn't follow the Lord nor pretend to. They were people with drug and alcohol issues. I use to question if I was suppose to be there  or not and kept leaving the environment only to find myself in a similar one. The last 2 places that I have attempted to live in have been with actual roommates. The last one was a drug addicted alcoholic with pretty deep issues and though she was a nice person I thought I had made a mistake due to her life style and mine clashing. Little did I know it could get worse. When Charlie got transfered this 2nd time I was on an extended visit with my sister in North Carolina and wasn't sure if I could move to where he was. Well low and behold one of his brothers lived in the next town over with his wife and they offered to let me stay there so I could be close to Charlie. I had my reservations and knew they weren't Christians but according to what they told me there would be no drugs or alcohol in the apartment among other points they made that I based my decision to come here on. Again looking back I don't know if I really sought Gods thoughts on it or just wanted to be close to Charlie and get back to standing by him. I know I really prayed about it and now I think maybe I was just hoping for the best. I guess I got myself confused because I've had this debate regarding living with non believers for the last 1-2 years and don't have a good solid answer. I get some thoughts from people that I could be the light people needed and could be an example of a Christian for people who didn't know God. I have gotten various answers but nothing that has given me peace on this subject. I can't go back wards and until God opens up a door for me and gives me some direction I don't feel like I can leave. I am asking for future reference as I truly think I made a mistake coming here. These people are extremely racist(I mean straight out of the southern 50's), foul mouthed(When the say Jesus, Christ or God they aren't calling for him- among the other horrible words they use), drug addicted, drug dealers and so on and so on. It's so bad here that this is why I doubt my choice in coming here. I can't believe God would lead me into a living situation like this! I have sought Gods forgiveness and continue to pray for guidance and direction and I know He loves me and will direct me and show me an open door when he is ready. I'm sorry this is so long but I wanted to explain myself. So that is my question- according to the bible should a Christian be living with non believers? I know it is written in various places about being unequally yoked, fleeing from different sins etc so I would like your thoughts on this please! I think I need to base my future living arrangements on being able to live in an environment that honors God but perhaps I am being biased or not being loving or something....what I know is I am miserable in this type of environment and have truly confused myself! Thank you for your time and answer!  
Berdy
 
Posts: 48
Joined: Fri Jan 03, 2014 5:21 am


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